After the incident mentioned in the previous post, i felt wrong : Why did that happen to me?
Being a shy kid is difficult. you get bullied a lot. It didn't help that having a health problem, i wasn't allowed to do sports for 5 years. : i suffered from 6 years of physiotherapy (3 times/week) before i was allowed even to lift my school bag for a long duration ! Now i have to do special exercises at gym, 3 times/week, or my condition gets worst.
Skipping to those details, i can't say i had the worst life as a child, but it wasn't easy ! Neither was growing up as a teenage kid, molested twice by his brother, never got what he wished for as a kid, and still living in the closet because if someone knew from my family that i'm gay, that will be the end !
How i decided to finally be active ?
That's a tough question
It took around 4 years of thinking, reading, porn, and browsing online before i decided i wanna experience it !
I wanted to finally have consensual sex with a man. i didn't want it to be special with a boyfriend and all that ! i just wanted to have sex where i'm not forced, but want it to happen !
So i created a fake Facebook account, with real information, except my name and my contact info (fake email of course), and put a display pic, me standing with my back to the camera, wearing a jeans and a t shirt !
Every lebanese gay man, a true gay man, knows that it won't get you likes because 90% of lebanese gay men just want sex, that i know now after 3 failed attempts to relationships and a lot of crying !
So i changed the pic to a half naked pic, and updated my status : I don't want to be a virgin anymore !
I got around 40 likes/comments in 1 hour ! That should summarize the lebanese gay scene for you !
Anyway, after a month of talking to stupid guys, i chose someone : a 26 years old guy, slim fit, smooth body, to be my first. We spent around 2 weeks talking on MSN : he was gentle, easy to talk to, he explained what he wants/likes, and what he expected, and so did i, it wasn't his first time, but he was more than happy to help a newbie ! So we agreed on the sexual details, and decided to go to my village house and spend the night there, in the middle of the week, and that what happened.
Details in the next post !
Being a shy kid is difficult. you get bullied a lot. It didn't help that having a health problem, i wasn't allowed to do sports for 5 years. : i suffered from 6 years of physiotherapy (3 times/week) before i was allowed even to lift my school bag for a long duration ! Now i have to do special exercises at gym, 3 times/week, or my condition gets worst.
Skipping to those details, i can't say i had the worst life as a child, but it wasn't easy ! Neither was growing up as a teenage kid, molested twice by his brother, never got what he wished for as a kid, and still living in the closet because if someone knew from my family that i'm gay, that will be the end !
How i decided to finally be active ?
That's a tough question
It took around 4 years of thinking, reading, porn, and browsing online before i decided i wanna experience it !
I wanted to finally have consensual sex with a man. i didn't want it to be special with a boyfriend and all that ! i just wanted to have sex where i'm not forced, but want it to happen !
So i created a fake Facebook account, with real information, except my name and my contact info (fake email of course), and put a display pic, me standing with my back to the camera, wearing a jeans and a t shirt !
Every lebanese gay man, a true gay man, knows that it won't get you likes because 90% of lebanese gay men just want sex, that i know now after 3 failed attempts to relationships and a lot of crying !
So i changed the pic to a half naked pic, and updated my status : I don't want to be a virgin anymore !
I got around 40 likes/comments in 1 hour ! That should summarize the lebanese gay scene for you !
Anyway, after a month of talking to stupid guys, i chose someone : a 26 years old guy, slim fit, smooth body, to be my first. We spent around 2 weeks talking on MSN : he was gentle, easy to talk to, he explained what he wants/likes, and what he expected, and so did i, it wasn't his first time, but he was more than happy to help a newbie ! So we agreed on the sexual details, and decided to go to my village house and spend the night there, in the middle of the week, and that what happened.
Details in the next post !
Whoa! You should write a book! Juicy!
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